Nannie

I was thinking about my grandmother today. We called her Nannie. This isn't some sentimental journey down memory lane with tears welling up or a quivering jaw. It's more like a furrowed brow and a set jaw. I missed her today because we need her.
Nannie was the ultimate politician, using her wit and personality to charm those around her. "I love your grandmother," folks would say, "she is so caring and nice." I would nervously nod with forced smile. You see the real Nannie, the family Nannie, was cunning, tough and cutthroat.
One time, my younger brothers, Nick and Jared, were spending the day with Nannie. Jared, younger than Nick, came in from outside, crying.
"What's wrong?" Nannie asked.
"Nick hit me with a stick." Jared replied through his 'I'm gonna get someone in trouble' tears.
Nannie got up from in front of the TV (I think one of her 'stories' was on) and walked out on the porch, Jared right behind her. Nick was standing still in the yard, knowing his world was over. Nannie starts looking around the back porch for something, still not saying anything. Finally she picks up a 2x4 about 3 feet long and hands it to Jared. Jared just looks at it then back at Nannie questioningly. Exasperated, Nannie says, "Well...go hit him with it!"
Another time she randomly calls up my cousin Rick, who lives on the opposite end of the state.
"Hey, Nannie, how are you."
"Oh fine, but I have a question for you Rick. Would you do something for me?"
"Sure Nannie, what is it."
"Would you be a pall bearer at my funeral."
"Oh, Nannie, I would be honored to do that."
"Well it's good to know that you'll come see me when I'm dead, 'cause you sure as he(double hockey sticks) don't come while I'm alive."
Click (no really, she hung up on him).

So I'm thinking today, instead of crying, let's hit these Democrats back (of course I mean at the ballot box. "Oh, no another extreme right wing Christian militia racist blog is talking about 'hitting'. They're sooooo mean spirited and threatening!" I think I said 'cutthroat' earlier too). Let's give them an earful of our dissatisfaction with their current disrespect for us and what we need as citizens. Not what they tell us we need but our actual needs.
I think those needs are pretty basic, completely spelled out in the Constitution. Life, Liberty, Pursuit of Property. Then defend our borders, get out of the way and watch us soar.
Of coarse according to people like Paul Krugman, at the NY Times, if Nannie were here she wouldn't be for long. Gotta get rid them old people because that's were we cut (watch out, I said cut) down that deficit, thanks to the Deathcare bill.

Lib quote of the day:
"Can you imagine if some of these reporters were working on a farm and you planted some seeds, and they came out the next day and they looked and — 'Nothing's happened. There's no crop. We're going to starve. Oh, no! It's a disaster!' It's been a week, folks. So, before we find out if people like health care reform, we should wait to see what happens when we actually put it into place. Just a thought."
-Barack Obama, back on the "hey, you guys need to get used to this dog food" tour.
YOU MEAN THIS 2700 PAGE LAW IS LIKE A SEED AND WILL GET BIGGER!!!!
By the way, the Homestead Act of 1862 (you know, the one that opened up a majority of this country to settlement and eventually statehood...pretty big deal) was a whopping 2 pages.

Poor Boy

Yep, that's right. I'm a poor boy. I make $10.00 an hour, I have 9 mouths to feed, and yet I am still a capitalist pig. Now many capitalist out there might be groaning, "Oh, please don't accentuate the 'pig' part." I kind of find it endearing. I mean, it worked for Piggly Wiggly, right?
Look, anytime a liberal windbag tries to tag any desenter of their statist policies, agendas, or their just pure hatred, they need to be laughed at. The best policy, I have found is to take the tag and pin it to your chest, sarcastically. Call me a capatilist pig, I'll smile and say 'thank you, Ronald Reagan is my role model'. It really just throws their last shred of decent human behavior out the window, and they are reduced to a screaming, bratty 7 year old with the vocabulary of a drunken sailor.
Seriously, several years ago while still in school, this lib girl (I figured she was liberal just from the shaved head and the biohazard tattoo on the back of her neck) starts ripping into 'trickle down economics' (oh, and she was bashing 'trickle down economics', so kind of a dead giveaway to lib status). She said, "Why would anyone believe in that?" I said, "Probably because it works." She turned around and said, "Shut up you *bleeping* republican." I just laughed and everybody laughed with me. She just fumed while the professor looked anxious.
Now you might be saying where is this going. This is about letting them know we are not going to cow tow anymore. Their usurption (ok, I kinda made that one up, but it sounds cool there) of our power as individuals, their pompous elitism, their hatred of liberty; it all has to stop. This country is the last bastion of freedom. The light is still there but they're trying to snuff it out. Who the heck wants to be like Europe? When was the last time any American immigrated anywhere? I've never read where 30 Americans washed up on Cuba's shore in a bathtub because it's so awesome there.
As you can see I'm a little ADD. Too many thoughts and too many slow fingers. Anywho, I'll try to post a great lib quote everyday for your enjoyment. Today's is more headshaking than funny (sorry, Joe "bleeping" Biden seems to be hiding today). I also hope this doesn't get so serious as it did today. I believe laughing them into knee jerk, screaming hatemongers will prove their irrelevance. I mean, their illogical nature is kinda funny.

Lib quote of the day:
"From the moment I was sworn into office, I've spoken about the urgent need for us to lay a new foundation for our economy and for our future,"
- Barack Obama 3/30/2010 after signing deathcare addons
Oh, you've done it buddy. The foundations laid. I just hate that everytime I take a step on the new foundation, my shoe smells like crap.